As a teenager, I was rarely without my Walkman (clunky, red, beautiful) while out of the house, and while in it I spent countless hours lying on my (acrylic, black, static-ridden) beanbag with my head in between the enormous fuzztastic speakers of my parents' Amstrad sound system (which they moved to my room when I was about 14 - at the time I thought this was an act of extreme generosity, but now I realise it may have had much more to do with not wanting to listen to Leonard Cohen on a Friday night). Either way... my ears, my space, my music.
Later in life, you share your music, you share your bedroom, you share your hard-won inner space. This is, arguably, the point of life -- to the point that ultimately you usually get round to sharing your genes, and the species moves on.
That sharing thing is totally great when it's working, but what happens to people who had all that space, all that privacy, and then gave it up for something that turns out not to be worth nearly so big a hill of beans?
In this particular scheme of things, I don't do so bad. I have a lot of time and space to call my own if I want to. Yet when you cohabit, somehow you often end up watching lowest common denominator television, cooking for assorted people you have in your life for random reasons, reading last weekend's Guardian Guide over and over again.
But tonight something good happened. M's children are still not speaking to him, our lodger was out on the town, there were no other social engagements. We had our mental and physical space to ouselves.
We also have new 'listening chairs' in the middle room. They are both from Ikea (and so cheap as chips) but -- and this is the really grown up bit -- they are NOT THE SAME. Because we are NOT THE SAME. I have gender-aware furniture. I rock.
And for the first time in many many years I turned down the lights, turned up the music and sat directly in between the speakers to optimise the listening experience.
Drink: Manzanilla, Famous Grouse, Tesco value sparkling water
Albums: Talk Talk: Spirit of Eden; Bevis Frond: Superseeder
Ambience: Fairy lights, house plants, tealights
Mood: Post-Simpsons, post-divorce, post-prandial
We could have done with some THC, but you can't have it all. I feel lucky to have most of it.
joella
1 comment:
I find it difficult to see how having the Tenet Heathcare Corporation on hand would have enhanced the atmosphere, but each to their own I suppose.
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